Hello Dear Reader,
Thanks for writing and here is your answer to the question asking how I stay happy all the time. To start, I don't. You will never find a false smile on my face. If I don't like something, then my face will give it away. I don't need to say a word. Consequently, here's the first way I find and maintain personal happiness. I learnt, many years ago that the most powerful word I have in my vocabulary is 'No!"....................that's what I say, but my face gives out the clear message that "You can ..................." This is a liberating force for good. No pretending to be someone I'm not, no image of being 'nice' (I loath the whole concept to be honest) and no need to waste one second of my life pleasing people.
I manage stress. I make sure I put Dearly Beloved and myself first. Every time!
If you think that's selfish, then so be it.
We matter.
We take time for us, which means we schedule lots of nothing. We make sure we have days and days in our lives when we have nothing special to do. It means we can just stay home, read, watch TV, sit in the garden, go for a walk, go back to bed or just laze in the bath. We recognise when we are tired and make sure we do as little as possible until we have regained our equilibrium. If that means we don't see anyone but each other for periods of time, then that's the way it is.
We recognise what we need and what we don't need. In truth, we need very little. We also recognise, that if we want something and we can budget for it, then we have it. We don't ascribe to denial or the slightest amount of guilt. This again is liberating and makes us both feel free. We make our own choices. If we want to 'go out' we do. If we want to join in, we do. We are never swayed by the opinions of others.
We judiciously look after our health. Diet, exercise and plenty of sleep are non-negotiable. We eat healthily. We don't eat rubbish and we maintain a healthy level of calories. The answer to feeling bad about our personal appearance is never ever ever to reach to food as it can't love us, doesn't comfort us and never ever makes anything better. The same goes for exercise. Our bodies are not designed to be sedentary. I work hard to keep my serotonin levels up by exercising. We set a go to bed time and get up time which ensures we get plenty of quality sleep. We make sure the TV is off early and we never keep ourselves up late for any reason whatsoever. I run.............slowly but I'm always faster than the person who never gets off the couch. I work out...............as best I can but I'm fitter and leaner than the person who never does anything about it!
We have personal goals and work towards them. This means that we proactively work towards a better life every day. No slacking, no whining, no going back but also recognise that there are days which are not perfect and we have to pick ourselves up and start again.............and again.............and again! We have immediate goals and targets which we work at every day. We have long term goals that we work towards and will achieve eventually. It's too easy to see long term challenges as difficult, as sweaty, as dirty, as scary, as distant. They will get easier and will eventually seem effortless but you have to put in years and years of work until you feel that way.
I have had many many knocks in life and I get up and get going. I've said it before but the greatest gift God ever gave me was a rubber arse! I bounce back up every time. I've had self doubt but done it anyway. I've had fear and done it anyway. I've faced criticism and done it anyway. I could sum all this up by saying, I stay happy by:
- Respecting my own boundaries and ensuring everyone else respects them too,
- Not blaming others....................the choices were all my own!
- Taking care of my physical health.
- Having personal goals.
- Having resilience.
None of those cost any more than every day life costs any way. I make my own life therefore I make my own happiness.
I hope I've answered your question the best I can.
Now it's your turn and over to you Dear Reader. What do you consciously and positively do to take responsibility for your own happiness?
Now it's your turn and over to you Dear Reader. What do you consciously and positively do to take responsibility for your own happiness?
Until tomorrow,
Love Froogs xxx